my sea of obsession

i want him
so badly i can taste it
that yearning in the back of my throat
rising up to force the tears
down my already tear-stained cheeks
i could cry for years
and it would never change his mind
i stand between love and obsession
not knowing which way to go
angry at myself
for feeling the way i do
lashing out because i can't show my feelings
i always say the wrong things
at precisely the wrong times
tonight i vow
to get these feelings out of my heart
before they drive me
blinded with jealousy
completely insane
tumbling off the cliff of
unattainable love
into a tormenting sea
of obsession.

4/24/00